My Mama Didn't Raise No Fool
Music - Tom Hirschmann
Lyrics/vocals - David Ray Wehry

Well I love my baby, but she put me in a bind,
And I always tell her the truth…at least most of the time.
But she put me on the spot, & just to hang on to what I got,
I had to cover my "you know what"…and here's why.

We was going out to dinner, it was Friday night,
She was squeezing on a dress, 'bout a size too tight.
She said, "Zip me up"… I did just that.
Well then she said, "Do you think I'm getting fat?"
I said, "Oh, no baby, that's just not true…"
MY MAMA DIDN'T RAISE NO FOOL!

Well in Sunday school they told us fibbins' wrong,
But I know…which side…of the bread my butters' on.

Well we made it to the diner and we found a corner booth,
And our pretty little waitress smiled, when she brought the food.
But when she passed me my French fries…she gave me something else on the side…
The girl winked at me, and you can bet my wife saw it too!

Well in Sunday school they told us fibbins' wrong,
But I know…which side…of the bread my butters' on.

There was this awkward silence in the room…
I figured now would be a damn good time to find the men's-room.
My wife was twiddling her thumbs…
I thought, "Oh Lord, here it comes!"
She just glared at me & said, "I think your new girlfriends' cute!"

In Sunday school they told us fibbins' wrong…
But I know which side of the bread my butters' on.

I said, "Oh no, baby that chicks' a mess…she looks like a pit-bull, in a dress."
Then I leaned up & I gave her a kiss…well Dad said there'd be days like this,
I said, "Sugar, I only got eyes for you…"
MY MAMA DIDN'T RAISE NO FOOL!
And buddy, I ain't no fool…Un-uuhhh.

Copr. 2007 Big Enchalada Music Co.
Contact: David Wehry...

david.wehry@comcast.net
www.CountryMusicBusiness.com